A New Year

Now that I have a school aged child, I realize that the year doesn't really begin on January 1st. A new year starts the 2nd week in August.

Today was the beginning of a new year. First Grade!
She picked out her own outfit, brushed her teeth and even ate breakfast. My kids are not breakfast eaters. They like breakfast, but about 2 hours after they get up. But, she ate a bowl of cereal today without complaining and let me fix her hair with only a few mumbles about how I was hurting her. And she was ready to go.



She was excited and didn't seem to be nervous. I walked her to her class and she found her seat and started working on her coloring page. I made introductions with the other girls at the table. There turned out to be more girls than I originally thought as many had gender neutral names like Jordan and Ikea.

She wasn't sad, clingy or really even shy.


And I didn't get teary eyed at all. I was so excited for this day. I missed it last year because I was in the hospital. So, today I was thrilled to be here for my girl and take her to school. It was a good day.

Now, the house is quiet. Emily is my wild child. Ben is completely mellow. He's on the computer next to me playing games with headphones on. Noah is sleeping. Ben's preschool doesn't start until after Labor Day. So, I'll hang out with my boys for the day and enjoy the quiet.

It feels good to get back into the groove of school.

One

It was nice to reflect on Noah's entry into the world in my last post.

But this is now, and let me tell you a little about my boy.

He is crawling all over the place and pulling himself up on anything and everything. He still is not sleeping through the night, but he wakes up once for a bottle and quickly goes back to sleep. He loves watching Elmo. He will eat any fruit and vegetables, and cheerios are his favorite. He talks. A lot. Not that any of it makes sense, but he likes to hear his own voice. He did crawl towards David as he was babbling Dada, and he seems to say up after we say it. He's observant and stubborn. He smiles and laughs easily. Emily is by far his favorite person. He loves going to the pool with us and doesn't even complain about the cold water. He's usually pretty happy and content. He likes to be held and he loves when we do "chicken wings" on him. That's when we lift his arm and tickle him. He just cracks up. He's simply wonderful.

His silhouette looks like Gumby.


We are moving the crib mattress down today.


We got him some balloons for his birthday.


Ben put sprinkles on the cake.


Emily put on the "1" candle.


Noah was pretty excited about all of it.


He opened a few presents.


Emily and Ben having Ben dying for these pillow pets that they see advertised on a TV commercial. I went to the web page and let them show me which one they liked best. I ordered one for each of them. I got Noah the monkey because we call him monkey munch, monkey moo, monkey butt...and Noah got to open his first. I thought the kids would be all mad that Noah got one and they didn't, but to my surprise, they were genuinely happy that he got one. Noah on the other hand could've cared less.


Then, I let Emily open hers. She wanted the dolphin.


And Ben opened his. He wanted the lady bug. I tried to encourage something fierce like the lion or alligator, but he wanted the lady bug. So be it.


Noah's favorite was the wrapping paper.


Then he had cake. He still is not into thicker textures and even a piece of banana will make him puke. So, I wasn't sure how this would go.
At first, he wasn't so sure about it.

But he was curious.





Then, he just decided to lick it. Good tactic.



When all was said and done, this was as messy as he got. But he had fun, and that's what it's all about.

Happy first birthday son.
We love you bunches.

One Year Ago...

I can hardly believe that Noah turns one today.
Where does the time go?

I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday. Even doped up on magnesium, I remember the doctor and anesthesiologist coming and talking to us about delivering Noah. If they could've gotten me stabilized, they would have left him in as long as possible. But my numbers were getting worse. He had to be delivered today. We were hoping for a natural birth but my body was refusing to cooperate. So after having two vaginal births, I was going to get my first c-section. They talked to us about administering a spinal to numb me, but the side effects were too great. Since my blood platelets were extremely low, there was risk of paralysis, stroke and coma. No thanks. We decided to knock me out completely and I would receive a blood platelet transfusion during the surgery or I would have never clotted.

Because of the higher risk, David was not allowed in the operating room. So it went that our baby was born, and we didn't get to see it.

But, they quickly got David as they wheeled Noah into the NICU.

He was a whopping 3 pounds 12 ounces. We've eaten bigger rotisserie chickens for dinner.

He was a fighter from the get go.


He was immediately hooked up to a machine to monitor everything...pulse, blood pressure, temperature, oxygen. He had an IV for fluids, a tube down his nose for formula and nose probes for oxygen. One minute he's inside me enjoying the nourishment from Little Debbie's Swiss Cake rolls, the next minute he is like this.


I didn't see him (other than a picture) for 3 days. Delivering Noah was the cure to all my problems, but the numbers got worse before they got better. Alarmingly worse. I had an IV to put fluids in, an IV to take blood out, I had been poked about 100 times in 5 days, still had a catheter in and those great "socks" that massage your legs to prevent clots, and I was still drugged up on magnesium which makes you feel like you are drunk with a touch of the flu. I wasn't going anywhere.

But, I slowly started to feel better and my numbers slowly started to head towards the normal range. And I finally got to see my son. This is when I held him for the first time.

The pictures really don't give you any idea, but he was so tiny.

I was prepared to do whatever I had to to get him him home. Holding him was virtually impossible, especially when they moved the IV from his arm to his head.


Little by little, wires and tubes started coming off. They had originally told us not to expect him to come home until his due date. 9 weeks in this place and being away from Emily, Ben and David. I prayed all the time for the strength to get through this. I wanted nothing more than for all of us to be home as a family. And our little man did more than his part. By his 34th week, he was ready to try a bottle which was his final hurdle before going home.


And within 3 days, the feeding tube came out and I got my first look at him without a bunch of tape and tubes on his face. He was a handsome little guy. Apparently, he wanted to go home as much as I did.


And after 18 days, we did just that. A part of me was so excited, and the other part of me was so scared. I was an absolute nervous wreck the whole way home. I sat in the back of the van with him and just watched his every move. But, our little bean did just fine.


We call him the $200,000 baby because that's what the hospital bill came to.

And he's worth every penny.
(But thanks to insurance, we only paid $110!)

Meet & Greet

Last night was the meet and greet and Emily's school. This night will always bring back a flood of emotions for me. As it was last year at Emily's meet and greet that I just wasn't feeling very good. I was pregnant, barely 32 weeks, and I knew something wasn't right with my body.

I remember coming home from the open house and laying on my left side on the sofa, praying the pains would go away. Then, I told David we needed to go to the hospital. I was fully prepared for a quick check up and we'd be home in time to watch the finale of So You Think You Can Dance. But, nothing went as I planned. Within an hour, I was kissing the kids and David goodbye and calling my Mom to have her come up from Phoenix to stay with the kids while David drove down to Phoenix to meet me.

My liver was about to rupture. My kidney's were not functioning properly. My blood platelets were dangerously low. My blood pressure was extremely high. I got a steroid shot to help Noah's lungs. I got an IV full of magnesium to stop seizures. If I had one, the baby wouldn't get oxygen. Magnesium makes you want to puke, so I did that and got a catheter in. Within a few hours of meeting Emily's Kindergarten teacher, I was being loaded on a stretcher (feels like an ironing board) and whisked away in this.

It was the scariest night of my life. Even now, I can barely wrap my head around it. I hadn't heard of HELLP syndrome and didn't know a whole lot about preeclampsia, so the fact that I had both was troubling, but since I couldn't google my diseases, I didn't realize that what I had was life threatening. Ignorance is bliss. Well, it may not have been bliss, but it was probably a good thing that we didn't understand how bad I was. Until the Doctor informs David and I that women die of this sort of thing all the time in Afghanistan.

And I thanked God that I wasn't in Afghanistan.
For more than just the obvious reasons.
But, that was last year and this is now.

And now comes the fun stuff...meeting Emily's first grade teacher.
FIRST GRADE!

Emily was quiet and shy, but not as much as last year. We walked down the long hallways to the first glade classrooms. And her teacher had a monkey bulletin board with a bunch of bananas on it outside her classroom.


We introduced her to Mrs. Smith and she seemed very nice. Emily was more interested in checking everything out. Which was fine as about a dozen other people were there too. Emily sat at her desk and looked at her text book. Her very first real official text book. Last year, they had workbooks. She looks so proud of herself.

And we couldn't be more proud of her. She's a great little girl and a wonderful student. I can't wait to see all that first grade has in store for her.

A New Day

Yesterday was one of those days. David and I just weren't gelling from the get go. We were both tired and cranky. Well, at least I was. I spent the day having little temper tantrums in front of my kids. I don't recommend it. Although, I guess it's good for them to see me lose it every once in a while. And it's good for them to see their Dad and I have a little spat and kiss and make up after. It's what people do and I hope they learn how to resolve conflicts and pull themselves out of a funk from their parents.

I've been on a cleaning spree this week. There were moments throughout the day yesterday and the day before that I had to just stop and grab the camera and remember the moment.

Like when I was vacuuming the dog hair off the tile (which then needs to be swept and swiffered and mopped, it's a process) and Noah was crawling all over our 2900 square foot home following me. I looked down the hallway and he was crawling out of his room and this is what I saw:

I don't know how tall our ceilings are 12 feet maybe, but he looks so tiny.

Then, he stopped to cry and chew on his fingers. He has a runny nose, fever, feels nauseous and he's teething. Oh vey.


We got another monsoon storm. They just keep coming, so that mowing the lawn is nearly impossible. The kids think it's fun to go out with their umbrellas.

And if it makes this boy smile like this, then he can do whatever he wants.


Noah is Irish, Italian and Mexican and he is stubborn as all get out. Why couldn't we have some sweet blood, like Dutch or Swedish or something mixed in there to round us out? He wasn't happy with anything yesterday. So, Emily told me to give him to her and she would calm him down.

And she did.


And can I just tell you how much I seriously love that girl. When Mama was having a little breakdown yesterday, she came over and gave me a hug. Then, we had a conversation that went something like this:
Emily: What's the matter Mama? (she calls me mama)
Me: Oh, your dad and I are just not getting along great this morning. He hates his work and they keep taking money away from him and we are tired.
Emily: So, why can't he get new work?
Me: It's not that easy. (as in, our local paper has 26 listings under help wanted and since he can't drive a truck and won't be a hostess at Chili's there isn't much left)
Emily: Well, if he needs money, he can have whats in my piggy bank.

And I just melted. She's awesome. So I just smothered her with kisses and told her everything will be fine. Because it will be.

Then, I got outside and mowed the lawn for the first time in over 5 years. When I was single, I mowed and weed whacked and hedge hogged everything in my front and back yard. When I met David, he started doing all that stuff. And I was thrilled. But, since we hadn't gotten rain in almost 24 hours, I thought I should seize the moment before the billowy clouds opened up again.

And can I just say, that I miss it. I was sweaty and dirty and covered in grass and it felt great.


And now I'll end with a little video clip of my little guy. I don't know if he will be a drummer or a dancer or a singer. But, he does a little of all three in this video. At least I know he will have great taste, he's jamming out to Coldplay.

The Pit

Let's face it, my house is a giant play room. I try to contain toys and keep things orderly, but it rarely looks nice. I try to go with the flow, knowing that in a few years their "toys" will be Nintendo DS, I Pod and a laptop. The Barbie townhouse will be sold (in this economy, foreclosed on) and the superheros will fly away. So, I enjoy this time even if it means chaos.

There is a place for most everything in their rooms. But for some reason unknown to me, they prefer to take their toys and bring them out in the main living areas and play with them there. At the end of the night, we usually do a quick clean up which means tossing the toys in one of the five various plastic totes in the room.

After 4-6 weeks, the bins are overflowing and I can't take it anymore. Dolls and robots are perched everywhere because we are out of room in the totes. When I can't take it any longer, I gather all of the bins and extra toys around the house and dump them in a pile in Ben's room. Emily's room is smaller, but we gave her the one with the walk in closet. So, Ben's room it is. I tell them "It's time to get organized." And after explaining what that means to Ben, we start at it.

Emily did not want me to take a picture of the mess.

But it looks something like this.


I make the kids help me put everything away.
"Ben, put this in the super hero bin."
"Emily, all the doll clothes in the little suitcase."
And The Captain (me) barks out orders for a few hours and everything is put away.

Except yesterday, five minutes in, Emily started to get another fever. And Ben, said, "this is boring" and walked out. Truth be told, he's not that great of a helper when it comes to putting away toys. Emily is the helper. So with my first mate on the bed with a fever and our deck hand out watching Scooby Do, I tackled the entire pile by myself.

I had to stop to feed Ben, clean up Noah (and me) after he decided to explode in his diaper and clean up Emily, the sheets, and me after she puked everywhere. It took me the entire day. Literally, I didn't finish until 4:00, but it looked like this when I was done.
David come home and didn't even have to ask what I did today.
Ben said, "Wow, it looks so pretty." I know it won't last 4 hours today, but he's making a great effort to put things back in their spot. He says that he likes to be organized.

It's a start.

Around Our House

I would love to say we had an exciting fun filled weekend. But, it was pretty low key.

Ben spent Saturday like this:

He had a fever, threw up orange juice and only ate saltine crackers.

Today, Emily looks like this:

She has a fever, is all stuffed up and only wants coffee. Even 102.4 won't keep her from her addiction. That's my girl!

And this little man has a major runny nose and will probably have a fever by Wednesday.

And if history repeats, he will have an ear infection by friday and we'll go to the doctor for round 6 of antibiotics since December. That is the magic number in under a year before we have the "tubes in the ear" talk. We've been clean since March though, so maybe the talk will wait.

This is our last week of summer break and I was hoping to do some fun stuff with the kids. Instead, I'll be taking care of sick babies and cleaning the house.

And who are we kidding? I'll be sick in a few days too.

My girl starts first grade next Monday.
Seriously, how is that happening?

It's sunny out my backyard window and raining in my front yard.
Seriously, how is that happening?

Noah turns 1 on Sunday!
Seriously, how is that happening?